We're On Facebook

Wow... maybe it's the old General in me, but Facebook sure is complicated. Damn! It took me forever to post about our upcoming Halloween Zombie Watch night. Regardless, it's there now. So start inviting people to the event and let all your friends know. I hear this Facebook thing is the new big thing, like they said about television when I was a lad. It's also linked for future reference under our newly created Zombie Watch Networking sidebar, to the right of this page.

Finally, an unfortunate by-product, but I now have a Facebook profile.

In an alarming discovery, the zombies are also using Facebook to organize their Halloween mayhem! Damn them and their 21st Century ways. It used to be that they'd just mill about outside a shopping mall and we'd go in with a jeep mounted GShG-7.62 machine gun and mow them down where they stand. Now they have Facebook pages and iPhones, and coordinate attacks using GPS.

What is this world coming too?

General Ryan
CZW

Rumblings From The Underworld

One of our team, codenamed Batman, has informed me of a zombie gathering that is due to take place in our city. Thankfully, this advance warning is more than enough to begin preparing a defense.

It seems that this coming Halloween night, Saturday the 31st of October, shall be the staging ground for an epic gathering of the walking dead in the heart of Cork after nightfall. They believe that the presence of so many costumed people on the streets will allow them to blend in easily. Insider reports even suggest that the undead themselves may attempt to get in the spirit of the season, meaning that we will have to deal with superhero zombies, famous film star zombies, sci-fi and horror character zombies and worst of all, frilly pink dress wearing faerie zombies. The horror! The horror...

You have been warned, team. You know what you will face. Prepare yourself over the coming weeks. Have an escape strategy. And keep reading for more updates and news reports.

General Ryan
CZW

Vigilance Saves Brains

Be safe. Be alert. Watch out for the following when dealing with zombies:

1. Zombies move slowly. You can outrun them, but they can outlast you. Zombies do not suffer from stamina penalties over time.
2. While a single zombie is a minor annoyance at best, they usually work in packs, and can surround an unsuspecting human in minutes. Always be aware of blind corners and dark alleys. You never know how close the rest of the group could be.
3. Though generally thought of as mindless killing machines, zombies are respective of private property and clothing. It's surprising how a good suit and a nice neckerchief can protect you from an attack. In fact, most likely, you may not even get blood on you in such an event.
   
4. There is one major exception to the above rule- The Law Of Manual Labor:

• Zombies are enraged by the site of duct tape! Something about it's texture or possible smell. It's like catnip to them. Reports have been flooding in from all over the world of increased attacks on those in the manual laboring trades, such as plumbers, electricians and duct tape wallet vendors.
  
• Remember to always wear old clothing while working with duct tape, and change out of them as soon as you are done. You do not want to be caught amidst a zombie mob smelling of duct tape.
  
• Related to the previous: Please be aware that the sight of a large enough piece of duct tape on your chest will almost assuredly guarantee your gruesome and grisly demise, rent asunder and covered in blood, only to return as one of them. The absolute worst thing you could possibly do would be to patch a tear on the front of your t-shirt with a large duct tape X during a zombie gathering. Please, for all our sakes, do not do this.

Remember these facts and rules and you might survive to see another day.

General Ryan
CZW

CZW Status Update: Operational

Welcome to the official operational site of Cork Zombie Watch.

CZW [pronounced: see-zee-double-u] came about under increasing pressure from worldwide active groups against the threat of the walking dead. Cork has been lax in its response to the zombie threat, ignoring pleas from organizations such as ZombieWalk.com, Crawl of the Dead, or Zombie Pub Crawl, and even warnings from our neighbors in the UK via Terror4Fun. However, we have finally gotten together to start this site, recording activity of the living dead in the south of Ireland.

This site will track movement, slow as it is, of the menace, and ensure you are kept up to date with gatherings of the undead nightmare. Importantly, the site will update with breaking news on the as-yet-undiscovered causes of this apocalyptic event, and possible treatments or, hopefully someday, even a cure.

Welcome to the Resistance. You are now a member of Cork Zombie Watch. Be vigilant. They lurk everywhere.

General Ryan
CZW